Thursday, March 20, 2008

13. Urge to converse is difficult to suppress

We, human beings, have a strong urge to communicate. Because we have a mind, we can think and because we have a heart, we can feel. We are not happy with keeping our thoughts and feelings to ourselves and like to share them with other human beings all the time. If we have a thorn in our flesh, we may be able to tolerate it for some time, but if we have a strong feeling hidden inside us, we want to express it immediately. If not expressed, it torments us, causes us stress and leads to all types of physical and emotional problems.Some people are very good conversationists and are never short of listeners. Everyone flocks and remains glued to them. If they have some expertise in some topic, people are even willing to pay for making them open their mouths. Little do such listeners realize that good communicators are capable of passing trash without any one realizing it. The listeners may return home very happy without gaining anything at all. In fact, realization that one is a good communicator may sometimes takes away the motivation to learn or prepare a topic in depth.Some people are not good conversationists, but are fortunate enough to have a few good friends. Such fortunate ones have a chance to ventilate their thoughts and feelings to their heart's content. You may occasionally meet a person whom you cannot tolerate for more than two sentences, but his friends may find the same person quite entertaining.People who are not good conversationists and are without friends may still be able to express their thoughts and feelings if they are in a position of authority. A person who possesses big property may be able to converse regularly for some length of time with his relatives who are eyeing his property. A boss may be able to throw his thoughts and feelings at his subordinates who will tolerate him in the hope of a good CR and other benefits. In their zeal for a good CR, the subordinates may show so much interest in what the boss has to say that he may be tempted to speak much more than he would have otherwise done.Those who can neither converse well nor have friends nor are in a position of authority face a real problem. The easiest way for them is to look for soft targets- kind-hearted and civilized people who are not able to say “shut up”.

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