Thursday, March 20, 2008

27.Listen to pacify

It is not uncommon to come across people who are unreasonably cut up with us. The moment they meet us, they may begin to shower choicest abuses on us. Even if they are gentlemanly enough not to resort to abuses, they are likely to sulk and complain. It is human nature to express, and anger is something very difficult to suppress.The best way to deal with such people is to let them give vent to their feelings. If we encourage them to speak, listen to them with interest and don't interrupt them, their anger will soon dry up. It is our retort which fuels their anger. There are some people who are very good at keeping their feelings to themselves, but their face generally gives them away. Help such people talk about what is bothering them. Once they get going, they will be the ones who will do maximum talking.Listening patiently to people who nurse some grudge against us will prevent us from losing friends and help us make new ones. If we listen to such people with an open mind, we may find that contrary to our initial conclusions, their grudge is well-grounded. This will help us spot our follies and take necessary corrective action.Once the other person has given vent to his feelings, we may express our own feelings as well. After all, it is also human nature to react, specially when blamed unreasonably. Having had his say, the other person will now be in a receptive mood and may realize that his anger was misplaced after all. It is not very difficult to win over those angry or unhappy with us. We only need to let our ears do the job for sometime before our tongue can take over.

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